love isn’t always on time…

title from Toto. that’s been an echoing question in my mind as of late: what about the timing of love? is it on time? what does ‘on time’ even mean? what if you meet the right person and it’s just the wrong time? or it’s the right time but the wrong person? and what if it is the wrong time and the wrong person? why did that happen at all? you can go crazy asking yourself these questions.

i am enjoying this nanny job immensely. it feels providential. i take care of one little girl, she’s generally a very happy little baby, i’m learning mommying and balancing-work skills, and her parents are really happy for me to take her on long walks, even run errands with her if i need to.

teaching spanish is going pretty well, too. this week i wrote tests for the first time, since the younger boy i am teaching is trying to skip a spanish class at his school. for some reason writing tests successfully feels like a real accomplishment.

speaking of accomplishments: i am learning to drive standard! seth gave me a lesson yesterday, and i drove around their neighborhood for 30 minutes or so, and i didn’t stall out once! i did come very close, of course. but i am excited! i get a high out of learning new things that take up all your concentration. that’s why mountain biking was so fun. i mean, still is, but after a while, i wasn’t as keen on using all my concentration learning how to almost die, safely.

july 4th is my favorite holiday (happy birthday, giz!!) … and the fireworks did not disappoint me. it does seem like it is time to be back in waco with friends my age, since seth was the closest to my age of the group watching the ‘works. i have friends in asheville, but i seem to only do coffee dates with them. i ought to break out of that mold.

i think it’s my favorite holiday because it’s fun for everyone, not just people old enough to stay up til midnight (yet there are still fireworks), and it doesn’t become too materialistic like christmas does…. i mean the extent of the materialism was that joe brought over a ton of fireworks to seth’s house and all the little kids were pretty stoked. and i just love walking downtown, sensing people’s excitement, and seeing people with their families and friends. it doesn’t make sense how many people were downtown last night, how we celebrate the fourth all together in spite of our crazy political situation and all the dissonance, but somehow it is. and it is intensely beautiful to me.

last night was one of the insaner of the summer, i hope. it feels like this family is being pushed to a breaking point this summer. maybe that’s the point, that’s how my prayers are being answered, but it feels too insane to be providential.